Mike Hawk on CarBuzz (2141 comments)

Mike Hawk

COMMENTS: (2141)

EN-V Electric Pod Testing (Apr 09, 2011) Because, Sam... Walking and running is overrated
Number 7 Fast Five Charger R/T at NASCAR (Apr 09, 2011) Speaking of those youngsters, Theyre racing Indy by 14 yrs old before graduating to F1 at 18
EN-V Electric Pod Testing (Apr 09, 2011) Toilet standard. Shit and shop at the same time
EN-V Electric Pod Testing (Apr 09, 2011) Shopping cart attachment optional.
EN-V Electric Pod Testing (Apr 09, 2011) I'm sure crippies would buy this in a heart beat. Medicare would pay for it. Just like the power scooters This has crippy placard written all over it
Number 7 Fast Five Charger R/T at NASCAR (Apr 08, 2011) F1 also gets better lookin chics Seriously...supermodels!! NASCAR gets 2nd hand strippers and porn actresses. No exaggeration.
New Cars From Ice Nine Group (Apr 08, 2011) And don't forget the GTX
New Cars From Ice Nine Group (Apr 08, 2011) The 60s and 70s?!? The Cuda and roadrunner were Chrysler's "IT" cars
Number 7 Fast Five Charger R/T at NASCAR (Apr 08, 2011) Redneck fans prefer the oval races. They dunn goferr duh road courses. And if g-forces is the "excuse", then train and condition them to handle g-forces... Like the F1 drivers are conditioned
New Cars From Ice Nine Group (Apr 07, 2011) Something this black shoulda gone further into a firebird kit. But it's cool
Video: Platinum Motorsport Video Showcase (Apr 07, 2011) No cars purring or growling. Gay!!! They should just get some big tits in bikinis washing the cars. That wouldve been a better video. That wouldve been "epic"
Renault Zoe Car-Spa (Apr 07, 2011) Needs bigger headlights*
First Look: 2012 Acura TL (Apr 07, 2011) I hate chrome on anything automotive
First Look: 2012 Acura TL (Apr 07, 2011) I've said it before and I'll say it again... Chrome is ghettothugnastyharleytruckintrailertrash
Next Charger TBi Will Be Powered by an Alfa Engine (Apr 07, 2011) Just don't touch the Chally and we be cool.
Jury Rules For Toyota in Unintended Acceleration Case (Apr 05, 2011) On a serious note, Kyle is right. Just go on the Snopes site...
Gold Infiniti Hopes to Lure Jewelry Buyers (Apr 05, 2011) He's admiring the work produced from the worlds best sweatshop. Little slave kids make great body customs!
Gold Infiniti Hopes to Lure Jewelry Buyers (Apr 05, 2011) Yeah...look how annoying this car looks. Quoting team America: "Jesus titty fu€£ing Christ!"
Tuned Koenigsegg CCR by Edo Competition (Apr 05, 2011) Well as long as he doesn't beat it with a bat or crash it in a lake or a curb... he's cool in my book
Mercedes Makes the Sprinter Van Cool (Apr 05, 2011) At least it's not that stupid MPV
Gold Infiniti Hopes to Lure Jewelry Buyers (Apr 05, 2011) But in the end, they're still commies on paper
Gold Infiniti Hopes to Lure Jewelry Buyers (Apr 05, 2011) But hey, we have a pretty sweet lender's clause with them. If they attack us, we don't owe them the borrowed trillions
Gold Infiniti Hopes to Lure Jewelry Buyers (Apr 05, 2011) Authoritarian democracy... Its really a watered down fascist state. The military govt calls the shots on who gets rich and who stays poor. The only thing missing is a fuehuer/dictator.
Video: Mike Ryan Knows How To Have A Good Time Too (Apr 05, 2011) ...and we prefer to call em "Big Rigs"
Jury Rules For Toyota in Unintended Acceleration Case (Apr 04, 2011) Patrick, I'm gonna sell personalized Velcro floor mats.
Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG GT3 Attacks The 2011 Racing Season (Apr 04, 2011) Awwe man! No NASCAR? Lotta rednecks gonna be disappointed.
Jury Rules For Toyota in Unintended Acceleration Case (Apr 04, 2011) Maybe it's just me, but how hard would it be to have some Velcro under the floor mat? I get rolls of Velcro tape from walmart & line it around the edges of the mats.
Jury Rules For Toyota in Unintended Acceleration Case (Apr 04, 2011) Anyone can go to India and get an MD degree in any medical field at a community college...online Don't expect to get ahead in American living if all you have is an Indian degree (case and point)
Seoul 2011: Chevrolet Mi-ray Concept (Apr 04, 2011) "imported from Detroit!" Wait...I meant Korea. This goes for ford as well.
Seoul 2011: Chevrolet Mi-ray Concept (Apr 04, 2011) AND ITS GONNA BE BUILT IN KOREA!
Lamborghini Miura Sold for a Record $1,705,000 (Apr 02, 2011) Only if the name was changed to "Wang Orgy's"
TG Australia Brings Mad Max Interceptor Back With Concepts (Mar 31, 2011) *No!* *No more talk!* We go in! We kill!
Breaking: Tesla Sues BBCs Top Gear (Mar 31, 2011) Tesla's long running glorified science project needs to end.
Video: Bangkok Motor Show Girls (Mar 30, 2011) Where I come from, carshows (good ones, that is) have wet t-shirt contests and big titty hos everywhere
Video: Bangkok Motor Show Girls (Mar 30, 2011) ...or any chics for that matter. Hey man, you set yourself up for that one! I couldn't resist.
Breaking: 542 HP Porsche Panamera Turbo S (Mar 30, 2011) When I hear mansory, I think about a violent prison gang rape that led to the creation of that circle jerk of a Gayron that you speak of.
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 30, 2011) Just FYI, this car can only be purchased with actual currency. Monopoly cash doesn't count.
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 30, 2011) Oh, "only 50k". Well then, I'll take 2 with cheese, hold the onions and pickles. That price is a helluva steal!
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 30, 2011) What the hell were you reading Gabby?!? We were comparing with a flat 6! God I hate presumptuous douchebags
Video: Bangkok Motor Show Girls (Mar 30, 2011) Adams apple. That's your indicator
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 29, 2011) See what I mean?!? Pride wins over better balance and functionality.
Inden Design Turns 2009 Mercedes S500 into 2011 AMG Lookalike (Mar 29, 2011) The picture pays tribute to merc's humble beginnings as a plane builder
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 29, 2011) That's what bothers me about this car. For it's price and all characteristics considered, who is the target market? There are tons of ways to mix and match with $68k, and this car is off my radar.
2011 Australian Grand Prix (Mar 28, 2011) You sure it wasn't NASCAR that bored him to death?
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) This backdrop looks like the French riviera.
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) UK, OZ, and japan drive in the wrong side of the road. You can wiki the others if it's really that important Yes I said the "wrong" side, and I'm sticking to it!
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) Pay half that much for an STi
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) 40k out the door. That's my offer broheim!
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) Christ on a stick... That's pricey!
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) A flat 6 would be better overall, but Audi is too proud to borrow technology from their Porsche brothers
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) Although, unless the fiesta comes in diesel, it still can't compete with the polo
First Look: Audi RS3 (Mar 28, 2011) It makes perfect sense. But I dont care to explain
iAmnotimpressed (Mar 28, 2011) Yeah, screw the crappy riced out civic! Get a respectable euro compact, for crying out loud. Like a focus RS or Abarth. For the same money as a crappy riced out civic, you could get a stock WRX (if you wanna respectable japanese compact)
iAmnotimpressed (Mar 28, 2011) Don't bother Billy... he's cleaning his room
iAmnotimpressed (Mar 28, 2011) Boys in highschool found excuses to "clean up" behind locked doors with this little machine
First Look: Nissan GT-R (Mar 28, 2011) I'm sure you can negotiate the price down to the 80s
$1.5 Million Veyron Goes to Salvage Auction (Mar 28, 2011) Filming for jackass 4.
Unveiling of Hondas Brio (Mar 28, 2011) Crash test in the third world?? They're barley testing for HIV!!
Unveiling of Hondas Brio (Mar 28, 2011) Someone or some ppl will tune this. I can't wait for the jokes on that
Spied: 2012 MINI Coupe John Cooper Works (Mar 28, 2011) Mini should gave gone with a body that paid tribute to the old MG But what do I know about Brit autos?!?
Romeo Ferraris Debuts Fiat 500 Abarth Ferrari 695 Tribute (Mar 28, 2011) This firecracker will put compact hondas and fords to shame. Ford and Honda had better find a way to keep up or lose in this market.
US Fiat 500 Prima Edizione Deliveries Start (Mar 28, 2011) ...still waiting for the Abarth...
US Fiat 500 Prima Edizione Deliveries Start (Mar 28, 2011) Actually, I think euro super/hyper cars have earned the respect to call certain editions as "collectors'"
Mugen Honda CR-Z in Progress (Mar 28, 2011) But that's my instant thought. There are several better options out there
Mugen Honda CR-Z in Progress (Mar 28, 2011) You'd get more for less$ with a 500 Abarth
Prior Design 6-Series Convertible (Mar 28, 2011) But this customz speaks gayenese.
Prior Design 6-Series Convertible (Mar 28, 2011) Douchebag from Malibu or Orange County. That's who the driver is. (And you guys know how much I like BMW)
Prior Design 6-Series Convertible (Mar 28, 2011) It's all about the big ass subwoofers with the big booty bass That's what gives extra horses! Rekanize!
Pininfarina Bluecar (Mar 28, 2011) Luis, you gotta think outside the box. Picture 16" alloys, a fat spoiler, racing stripes, soupcan fart exhaust, undercarriage neon lights... and for added HP, sponsor stickers ALL around the body! Sweet right?!? Ultimate chic magnet
Jaguar Celebrates At Goodwood (Mar 27, 2011) Chics don't know anything past looks. All cars are the same for them, and distinguished by size and color. You can forget asking a chic what model she drives. You'll only get something like: "it's a big yellow car/van" But don't expect more
Jaguar Celebrates At Goodwood (Mar 26, 2011) Is it coincidence that jags started looking nice when ford let go of them??
Koenigsegg Reveals Full Agera R Specs (Mar 26, 2011) I'd call it the "Hotbox GT"
Koenigsegg Reveals Full Agera R Specs (Mar 26, 2011) Okay...but weed powered cars would have the exhaust INSIDE the cabin
Koenigsegg Reveals Full Agera R Specs (Mar 25, 2011) Hemp fuel.... (I can dream, can't I??)
Koenigsegg Reveals Full Agera R Specs (Mar 25, 2011) How about a green bio fuel, made of soy?
Toyota Patents Designs of New Yaris (Mar 25, 2011) No badge. Must under debate whether it should be a scion.
2012 Ford Kuga/Escape Spied (Mar 25, 2011) I take it, watching grass grow is more exciting
Bowler To Get A New Owner (Mar 25, 2011) Glad to make the world a better place...kinda like that Jesus guy. The one with the blue eyes
Smart Fortwo Gets Glitzy Disco Styling for Berlin (Mar 25, 2011) Well at least they won't have a hard time remembering the last place they left their crystal meth and coke
$1.5 Million Veyron Goes to Salvage Auction (Mar 25, 2011) One of my favorite episodes. The NASCAR episode was funny as hell too
$1.5 Million Veyron Goes to Salvage Auction (Mar 25, 2011) Low miles, formerly owned by an old lady who only drove her Veyron back and forth to church and the market.
Hamann Releases Tycoon EVO M (AKA: Another Tuned BMW X6) (Mar 25, 2011) Maybe it's that time of the month, and they're cycles are in sync. Anyone gotta tampon for him?
Hamann Releases Tycoon EVO M (AKA: Another Tuned BMW X6) (Mar 25, 2011) Oh no, everyone, we've just been insulted by another douche fanboy! Careful, he'll text us to death. What's with all these emo manginas coming out of the woodwork?!?
Koenigsegg Reveals Full Agera R Specs (Mar 25, 2011) Speed Racer's Mach 1
Pathfinder Technology Explores the Ocean Depths (Mar 24, 2011) I don't cyber, sorry I'm flattered, but no
Comparison: 2011 Chrysler 300C vs. 2011 Hyundai Genesis (Mar 24, 2011) And for the record, CCCWH is a fine dining establishment. Best "big ass" biscuits in the tri-state area
Comparison: 2011 Chrysler 300C vs. 2011 Hyundai Genesis (Mar 24, 2011) This article is just a tricky game of "would you rather"
Comparison: 2011 Chrysler 300C vs. 2011 Hyundai Genesis (Mar 24, 2011) Call me a purist, but the charger should look like the 2 door fraternal twin of the chally
BMW M3 Ute (Mar 24, 2011) Please tell me the Merc MPV was also photoshopped by some bored soccermom. Because that is a mean joke
Pathfinder Technology Explores the Ocean Depths (Mar 24, 2011) Oh man did I ever get a beating! Whew. Ouch! And you still managed to put your tampon on while texting all of that? Kudos to you. Tell ya what, let's get you a shiny trophy for being such a great scout. Okay? Then we can go for some ice-cream.
Comparison: 2011 Chrysler 300C vs. 2011 Hyundai Genesis (Mar 24, 2011) Richard, the RS in particular is a German-Brit collaborative effort. Bet your keester they know how to make a focus and fiesta
A Farewell to an Auto Legend (Mar 24, 2011) Here here, to the Liberace of the auto tuning world!
Chevrolet Announces Captiva Sport for U.S. (Mar 24, 2011) Saturn was formerly called Geo
EDS Opel Astra Turbo (Mar 24, 2011) Sprinkle a little crack-cocaine in the fuel tank and you can forget about light speed Ludicrous speed!
Smart Fortwo Gets Glitzy Disco Styling for Berlin (Mar 24, 2011) Only if your name is tupac
$1.5 Million Veyron Goes to Salvage Auction (Mar 24, 2011) I include the oldies in the crippy category
$1.5 Million Veyron Goes to Salvage Auction (Mar 24, 2011) The gold interior trim?!? There's a reason I call it the "gayron"
$1.5 Million Veyron Goes to Salvage Auction (Mar 24, 2011) Sweet bearded Jesus, we've totally gone off topic. Meh, it happens all the time
$1.5 Million Veyron Goes to Salvage Auction (Mar 24, 2011) I'm referring to the undocumented ones. They drive worse than grannies
Pathfinder Technology Explores the Ocean Depths (Mar 24, 2011) you gonna make me, tough guy? Dont get your panties in a bunch, Nancy boy