Because the traditional family station wagon was just too slow.
Growing up, my mom drove a station wagon right up until the time many automakers began to drop them from their lineups. She then switched to a minivan. Quite a suburban move, I know. Now I'm sure that I'm not the only one here who has memories (some good, others not so much) of family road trips with younger siblings getting car sick, pit stops along the turnpike, and occasional arguments over absolutely nothing. Yeah, don't be jealous. All of these adventures took place in a good old station wagon.
My family opted for an Oldsmobile Cutlass Cruiser (which handled about as good as a Panzer tank) and later a Mercury Sable wagon (because everyone had the Taurus), both of which were safe, but unexciting choices. And it's too bad that the supercharged Cadillac CST-V Sport Wagon and the Mercedes-Benz E63 AMG wagon weren't around back then just to make that family time a tad more interesting. In this newly posted video from Motor Trend, Senior Features Editor and host Jonny Lieberman pits these two insane V8 wagon monsters against each other in a drag race.
The question, however, is what's more relevant: all-out speed or the overall package? Be sure to check out the video to find out MT's conclusion.